Go Speed Racer

I receive texts from Shrewsbury Stalker Scott now about every other day. Yesterday he texted me that he turned 19 and had closed the age gap between us some, am I sure I did not want to keep talking? This man has not seen a photo of me and yet somehow I have charmed him purely via the text talk. That just maybe the thought of a law firm employee in London has him seeing £££. I am sure it is my charm…
On Monday night I went out on another honest first date. And he went to public school in Shrewsbury. Synchronicity strikes again. The first date was fun. This guy is a real guy, not an international player. This means that I am actually nervous and excited. And forcing myself to play things cool.
So the next morning when I got dropped off back at my flat since I stayed over at his place, as I rarely do, I sat down and did a typical miss gl thing. I analysed the t the date until it wept, and wrote down all the things that I did wrong. First, I talked too much. I know he isn't a player, but I still should have been less of a photo and more of a frame. I tried, and I was really good about it at the beginning of the date. But then the wine flows down and in and I get talkative. And the wit flows too though. No one wants to date a stand up comedienne one who specialises in intensely geeky nerd girl shstick. Second, at some point I let it slip that I was concerned that since we talked so much the first time we met, that we would have nothing to talk about. Never let them see you sweat! Such a breaking of a ground rule.

And my litany of "oops" moments does not end. Actually, one more. The other one I am proud of, so let's take it first. He asked me in bed, whilst we were curled up, whether I was comfortable with him. Do I feel awkward or not secure or not at ease? To which I replied yes, I do, actually, I feel quite protected (men love protectors, always "go vulnerable" when in doubt, and obviously pulling out all the stops to make up for Mistake Three (see above). And about 5 seconds goes by. I say "hang on, you are actually asking me why we are not shagging aren't you?"…"well, um yes, actually". I am learning the ways of Englishmen not saying what they mean but something completely different and so you have to reverse engineer to reckon what they really are saying. It still takes a while though. To which I replied the usual, but a bit too wordy, sex is important to me, and I need to know someone and trust them to enjoy it, and I think that intimacy takes some time to build up, and I do find you very attractive and I think there is chemistry but I just don't work that fast. To which he replied, okay, or something like that. And what is really being said in my inner monologue is this (motion hands over body) has a price tag and it is called being taken out to some nice things before you get to reap all the benefits. mister. I don't even shag the men I am most attracted to; I absolutely won't for someone I just met and is still in R&D phase.

Lastly, we (I will now dub him Speed) had a discussion about the appropriateness aforementioned reverse engineer Englishman speak, aka inferring from what is not said. I know him through my ex, T who I went out with 5 years ago in the US, but T moved here 9 months ago. They are uni mates. I do not like my ex but for as a friend, but he wants to rekindle. I brought T to a party on Saturday and told him to bring single friends, he brought Speed. Speed and I got along famously and talked the whole time. However, a few weeks ago T invited me to be his date to a Venetian ball in the country this Saturday. I said yes as the caveat that I was going as his friend, not date. The invite says one person only. T being him, not the most delicate or aware of manners, is inviting people to come along, including Speed.

So, back to the pillow talk, Speed says well I may be going Saturday night too. And I say oh yes that is right, have you decided to go. And he says, "I think so, but if I do, you know, it is not like you and I are out together, it’s a ball, you know it’s a big party." Que? No me gusta this statement. Another typical miss gl 5 second pause measured by heartbeats. "what is that supposed to mean". What do you mean? Well, I don't get what you are trying to say. You are doing the typical English its what I am not saying, but I am not English so I need an interpreter: what you just said makes no sense to me. " "well, you know, its just that it’s a ball, and there are lots of people there, and it won't be the same as if we were going out like tonight or this friday". " are you trying to manage my expectations about how you are going to act around me? Now we are getting closer. What is this really all about". Pause. Silence. Big Male Sigh that says, women! "look, T invited you. Then he invited me, but I don't have a ticket. Then…I met you". So this is really about T and you isn't it (read: cock fight). Yeah, I guess so. Then why don't you just say so. It makes sense, and can't be misinterpreted like your first statement, which meant nothing. Well, it was supposed to make you aware of the tension there. It only did because I finally got you to tell me what you were thinking."

See what I mean about talking too much? Silly American Girl! I can try to be Euronised, but I still blabber. Big Girl Sigh. We will see how fast Speed continues to go or whether he puts on the breaks due to my motor mouth. We have a date tonight, and the Venetian masque ball is tomorrow.