a modicum of manners

I am in the preparation chamber, strapping my space suit on and doing a pre-flight check. Getting things in order for the launch. T minus - 8 work days, T minus 6 days actually at the office.....hols here i come!

Slightly hung over from the theatre/dinner experience with mate and two guys in the quasi-double date which was loads of fun although i continue not to be interested in the guy that i was paired with. Why? one, his teeth. Not pretty/straight/healthy enough. Two, from the beginning he set himself up as being the perennial bachelor love to have fun aren't i a challenge don't you want to be the one to catch me guy. I love having fun too and don't have marriage as a box to be ticked; but i would rather spend energy on guys who do not have loads of baggage or play games even if not conciously. This is a change for me-but i think it is something called maturity, not to be confused with age. Three, well, mostly the teeth thing, but i don't have the chemical attraction to push me into bed with him regardless of the baggage at the foot of it. Four, he dresses strangely. This is an area where few men get it absolutely right, a few get it very wrong, and most need a bit of assistance now and then but not always. Purple shirt with attached jumper-vest? Leather snakeskin gucci loafers? really tight jeans? admitting you like to wear lots of bright colours and often get mistaken for gay? yep, that is him.

I said to my friend J as we were necking a glass of wine pre-date that this guy, Lambo man, has a strange sense of dressing. Odd sartorial style is a better way. I asked J along when Lambo asked me if i had a friend for his friend C. As it happens, a mate of mine is on sabbatical, has the time and could meet at a reasonable hour (as opposed to my other City friends who are chained to their desks until 4am on deals), and hasn't had a date in ages. I reckoned, she needs to get on that horse and remember what it is like to make small talk with complete strangers with a smile on your face. How better to practice then on a guy that didn't ask you out, you don't ever have to see again, and no one is presuming is a love connection? about as low pressure as it comes.

Outside Richmond station, i spy the two dudes walking towards us, both in denim and white shirts. Lambo isn't wearing an odd bright colour, or strange cut, although the snakes are coming at me at ground level. J, i say, allow me to introduce Lambo and C. Hi, she says, So, she turns to Lambo, Holly tells me you dress strangely but you look fine to me!"

Did you get that? opening comment was a open mouth insert both of my feet comment handed to me by my mate. I was, for the second time this week, mortified. My friend is so miserably out of practice regarding small talk and flirty conversation that she actually dumps me in the water! And a score of Nil for her on the dating etiquette portion of the evening. I had to apologise several times and plump up his ego. All because my friend needs manners and mouth 101 class. I will not be asking her along again. Not without duct tape.